Why I’m masturbating more these holidays – and why it’s good for me!

masturbation o-diaries

Don’t call me these holidays. I’ll be busy masturbating. See, I’ve lost my sexual mojo over the past month with the inevitable work-related stress that creeps up this time of year – and I’m determined to get it back. Most of us massively underestimate the benefits of solo sex, when in actual fact, it’s one of the best mental and physical health remedies around. 

The benefits of going solo

Masturbation decreases the stress hormone cortisol, makes you more focussed, confident, and calm. It’s also been linked to improved sex drive, and better vaginal health. Not to mention, it’s a natural pain reliever and antidepressant. Best of all, it costs nothing, there are no side effects, and you can’t “overdo” it (I say this because one of the questions I get from readers the most is, “Is there such a thing as too much masturbation?” The answer, my friends, is no). 

And yet, as women, we don’t masturbate nearly as often as we should. In fact, research suggests young women begin having partnered sex years before their first solo sex experience. Why is this? 

We’re instructed to refer to our vulvas exclusively as our “private parts” and never utter the V-word aloud.

Masturbation myths

Unlike their male peers, who learn in sexed that boys have erections, ejaculation and wet dreams, girls learn their bodies are sources of shame and pain. We learn about the agony of menstrual cramps and unwanted pregnancy. The role of arguably our most important sex organ – the clitoris – is never even acknowledged. We’re instructed to refer to our vulvas exclusively as our “private parts” and never utter the V-word aloud. And, in short, we’re raised to believe that sex and masturbation are dirty, and never, ever to be discussed. 

Is it any wonder then, women aren’t masturbating nearly as often as we should, despite the enormous plethora of benefits solo sex gifts us with? 

A holiday treat

Ask yourself this: when is the last time your prioritised your own pleasure? Taking time out for some self-love with your vibrator may just be the best present you can give yourself these holidays. I highly recommend it as therapy for just about any stress the silly season hurls at you. (In-laws, Christmas Eve shopping and holiday traffic – I’m looking at you.) Now, if you don’t mind me, my vibrator and I have some catching up to do. Talk to you in a few weeks. 

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Author

Nadia Bokody is a sex-positive journalist and media commentator with a passion for empowering women in their sexuality, relationships and mental health. She’s also a regular columnist for titles including HuffPost, Mamamia, Thought Cataloug, The Sun, News.com.au, The Washington Post and more, and a regular sexpert on TV and radio shows including Triple M’s The Grill Team and Channel 7’s The Morning Show. Her relatable, comedic sex-ed YouTube channel has exploded in growth, amassing over 110,000 subscribers in just three months. When she’s not talking about sex or trialing the latest and greatest adult toys, she can be found running global women’s website, SHESAID.com.