Taoist sex is becoming more and more popular, but what does it really mean in practice? Let’s look at how the spiritual values of balance and harmony relate to sex and being intimate with your partner.
The Kamasutra might be the most famous example of sex meeting spirituality, but there are actually quite a few other cases of religion or philosophy influencing sexual practices. It’s a nice idea to consider linking sex and intimacy with the spiritual side, but what does it really mean? Let’s take a closer look at Taoist sex, which has seen a resurgence in recent years yet is still shrouded in mystery to some.
What is Taoism and what does it have to do with sex?
Taoism is a system of traditional beliefs from China and essentially concerns living your life so that it remains in balance with Tao. Who’s Tao? Tao is the source of everything that exists, so living in harmony with it means staying in balance with the energy of the world around you. When it comes to sex in particular, this emphasis on keeping things harmonious translates into maintaining a balance between qi (life force) and jing (essence).
Taoists believe that everyone has both qi and jing within them, and it is vital to maintain both at healthy levels. However, there are some ways in which jing can leave the body and, according to Taoism, semen is one of the ways in which men lose jing. In order to conserve their jing, men are therefore encouraged to either delay ejaculation or avoid it altogether.
Okaaay…that doesn’t sound that easy
Ejaculation is completely natural, so it can be difficult to hold yourself back from climax. Two Taoist sex techniques that have developed to assist this are:
- pulling out before orgasm and hoping that calms you back down
- applying pressure to the perineum (the space between the anus and genitals), which can cause retrograde ejaculation. This is ideal for Taoists, as they believe the sperm travels towards the head in a rush of positive essence
Good news: the act of sexual intercourse is considered to create jing on its own, so if you did end up ejaculating, it’s not the end of the world – or your Qi, your life force.
What does this mean for women?
As sex is all about balance, making sure the woman is satisfied is a priority in Taoist sex. According to historical documents, it was believed there were at least 10 ways in which women had to be stimulated for the sex to successfully share qi and jing. From oral sex to the use of sex toys, anything is allowed. The main thing is that the woman climaxes. As female ejaculation is less common, it was even believed that women emerged from the act stronger, as they had not lost any spiritual fluids.
Sign me up!
It’s no wonder that Taoist sex has become popular even among non-spiritual practitioners. The emphasis on balance and keeping things fair is appealing – especially for women. And especially in times when there is a lot of discussion about the Orgasm Gap. Additionally, the concept of a delayed ejaculation is an exciting challenge for many men, so it’s easy to see why exploring Taoist sex has become so popular.
Sex is already an important source of intimacy, fun and pleasure, so treating it as the origin of vital energy isn’t such a farfetched concept. And it gives you a reason to have more sex – not that anyone needed one!