Happy Valentine, my dears! Are you happily in love and spending today on roses with your sweetheart? Dear singles, don’t feel too jealous, because there it’s just as important to treat yourself as much as a partner would. That’s why, as my only good 2021 resolution (it’s mid-February, I wouldn’t have kept up the others anyway), I’ve decided to be big on self-love this year.
Self-love 2021: The most important of resolutions.
They seem to be as much a part of every new year as raclette is to New Year’s Eve: good resolutions. And they usually sound like this: From now on, I’ll exercise every day/I won’t eat any more chocolate/I won’t drink any alcohol for at least four weeks/I’ll finally tidy up my place. Honestly? Yawn, I can’t hear it anymore.
In the last few years, I’ve already decided to stop the crap of resolving every January to become a supposedly better version of myself. Why? First, because I usually failed and by mid-January at the latest, I was sitting there – with a glass of wine in my left hand and a cigarette in my right. And because that frustrated me so much, I immediately followed it up with an XL packet of candy.
At some point, I realized that I didn’t want to become a “better” version of myself, but a happier one. And that cutting out wine, cigarettes, and chocolate without compromise is not at all conducive to my personal happiness. This led me to the question: what actually makes me happy? In recent years, I was firmly convinced that a partner would make me happy. But I have also rethought this opinion – just in time for the new year.
Self-love 2021: That’s why self-love is the “best” love
I still think that it contributes to happiness in life to have a partner at your side who makes life a little more exciting, fun, beautiful, and sparkling. A pot and its lid are both round things. And for a few months now, I too have had someone who definitely has “lid” potential. It’s nice, no question about it. Nevertheless, I am aware that in the future I also want to be the whole unit solo too. I want to be my own best friend, my “partner in crime” and my dearest partner.
It’s simple: I know that I have to love myself sincerely in order to be able to love other people. I feel really good when I treat myself the way great love should be treated. And so on this New Year’s Eve, I toasted to a very special relationship in 2021: the one with myself.
Self-love 2021: Why is it so hard to love yourself?
From now on, I love, respect, and honor myself until death do us part… Well, easier said than done. While we usually treat our friends and partners generously, patiently, and lovingly, we treat ourselves like a teacher treats their student. Mostly because we recognize that other people are allowed to make mistakes and that we should sometimes let things go.
But when it comes to ourselves, perfectionism comes into play. We can’t make any mistakes, everything always has to be tip-top. As a result, we are constantly beating ourselves up and love ourselves too rarely. So the biggest challenge is to send perfectionism packing right now and to practice gentleness, kindness, and patience. And do it to ourselves. It takes a little time, but it can be learned. I promise. And once you’ve got this duty down, then comes the freestyle…
Self-love 2021: How to be the best partner for ourselves
Not constantly hitting on yourself is step one on the way to a healthy, and happy relationship with yourself. But there are a few other tricks I would like to share with you.
Explore & pamper your body – it is your temple
Our body is our foundation, our most important possession. And yet, we often don’t treat it the way it deserves. For healthy self-love, it is important to celebrate your body. To pamper it with good food, sufficient rest, and joy. And it’s important to really understand it. Luckily, the exploring phase is really fun, because self-love is the key. If you have solo sex regularly, you know every hotspot and every need of your own body. So you can put that on your to-do list for the new year.
Try new sex toys – they will take your me-time to another level…
Regular solo sex is healthy and makes you feel good about your body. But to prevent this from becoming a routine, it’s always a good idea to get some technical helpers on board. And the world of sex toys is growing and growing, the selection is huge nowadays.
Whether vibrator, stimulator, applicator, wearable or love balls – we are spoiled for choice. I do have my ‘all-time favorite’ with the Womanizer PREMIUM, but for even more self-love and fun, I’ve decided to try out new toys in 2021 as well. Wearables that provide ‘orgasm to go’ are at the top of my list…
Be honest with yourself
I think the cornerstone of a good relationship is honesty. This also applies to our relationship with ourselves. Those who sincerely love themselves are also able to pause, reflect, and also deal with self-criticism. Solving problems paves the way to being absolutely at peace with oneself.
Have fun and treat yourself
For many people it is important in a good relationship to have fun together, to do great things and to really enjoy themselves. Of course, this is especially fun in a couple, but you can do it just as well on your own. For my relationship with myself, I have resolved to pamper myself properly – just as I would with a partner. That means good food, wellness, adventure, lots of laughter, and a lot of self-love.
I think this year is the first year I’m sincerely looking forward to putting my good resolution into action. Anyone who needs a little more inspiration should check it out here. On that note, here’s to a wonderful, loving, and hot 2021!
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Sex and the City is a cult TV series and for a good reason. The 1990s HBO series was influential and set trends. Never before had women on television spoken so openly about their sexuality. Carrie, Charlotte, Miranda and Samantha lived an emancipated lifestyle and in many cases were an inspiration to real women.