If you went on a conventional date – a date with someone other than yourself – you’d probably get dressed up. You’d wear a nice outfit, put on make-up and maybe even liberally sprinkle yourself with your favorite perfume. There’s no reason why you shouldn’t do the same things when the date in question is a date with yourself. So, put on something that you feel good in. Treat yourself to a brand new outfit. Just remember: aim to impress – yourself!
Diamonds are a girl’s best friend
No, you don’t have to buy yourself diamonds to learn to love yourself. Phew. But do buy yourself flowers, chocolates and whatever other clichéd or original items you might buy someone on a first date. In other words, take the date with yourself seriously. It may seem funny or ridiculous at first, but any doubts will be quickly cast aside as you become increasingly amazed at just how enjoyable it is to give yourself little treats from time to time.
The way to a person’s heart is through their stomach
Your self-love date is an excellent opportunity to finally experience that restaurant you’ve always wanted to go to. Perhaps your partner has always preferred that rather boring Italian around the corner instead, but now it’s your turn to choose. Spoil and treat yourself to the best restaurant in town.
The way to a person’s heart is through their stomach – for beginners
Visiting a restaurant alone may be a date best left for those more experienced veterans of self-love. An equally enjoyable alternative is to cook for yourself. Take your time to shop, try out a new recipe and celebrate your kitchen creativity. Most importantly, celebrate yourself!
Baby, you look hot!
Don’t wait for someone else to tell you what they like about you. Give yourself some compliments! Stand in front of a mirror and acknowledge the things you like about yourself. Write them down in a diary. As the days pass, you’ll be surprised by the little compliments you gave yourself. A smile will be guaranteed.
It’s getting deep – listen carefully
We’re masters of self-distraction. We love to surround ourselves with people, watch movies and TV shows or browse the Internet endlessly – all in an effort to avoid having to listen to ourselves. The voices in our heads can be uncomfortable. The internal critic in us might suddenly start speaking about difficult things. “Where are you in your life?” “Where do you want to be?” “Which values do you have and why?” “Are you actually happy?” These are existential questions that aren’t easily answered. Your personal date night could be a great opportunity to focus your attention on some of the bigger questions about your life.
7 Let it go – declutter
Relics can hold us back. It’s time to leave behind the baggage of bygone days and move on. Are there any clothes from your ex still lying around? Get rid of them. What about photos of bad memories? Get rid of them. Things you no longer need? Get rid of them. In a word: declutter. You’ll feel noticeably lighter and more open to new things.
All you need is a hug
Give yourself a big hug. It may sound silly, but you’re allowed to be silly. After all, you’re alone with yourself: no one’s watching.
Start small – learning self-love is a process
Unconditional love to oneself may at times seem a long way away to someone who’s struggling with the basics. Take it slow. Self-acceptance and self-esteem are the first steps on the path to a healthy relationship with oneself. Recognize what you’ve already achieved. Write down 10 things that you like about yourself. Be patient and take care of yourself.
Happy End – a successful date deserves a happy ending
“Do it yourself – it doesn’t get better” the band Silbermond sang (I’ll ignore the terrible music at this point). Take time to seduce yourself. Stroke your body, perhaps try something new, masturbate to your heart’s content. Afterwards you can fall asleep without needing to be held in another’s arms. If you’re looking for some support with your masturbation, why not pick up a sex toy such as the Womanizer?!
Those who love and accept themselves find it easier to open up to others. Self-love and self-confidence go hand in hand. Your attitude towards yourself greatly influences your charisma. You’re allowed to love yourself. You’re allowed to shine. Just do it!
Autorin: Konstanze Teschner